“Mama the sun is back,” I am woken up by this every morning lately. “Why?”
I mumble something about how everything needs sunshine some of the time to grow and try to go back to sleep.
“Mama I want to see your face”
I turn towards him my eyes still closed, hoping for a few more moments.
“Where is Papa?”
In the kitchen I tell him.
I am not awake enough to shift the conversation.
He’s making tea and drawing, I offer.
Go ask him, I say hoping for a few more minutes of sleep.
“I want to sleep with you.”
It is quiet for a few minutes I am starting to drift off.
“Why are there cars on the street?
I give an answer about people going to work.
I say something about work and how everything needs to get done.
If you are awake go talk to your Papa.
Because Mama wants to sleep so she won’t be grumpy today.
We are heading downtown, Alder is in the ergo on my back.
“What’s that Mama?”
What do you mean why?
“What color is it?”
Do you know?
“Yellow. It is still living because it is still in the ground and has air.”
“Mama what’s that?”
You know that one
You told me this morning.
“Is it a pansy?”
Close a violet.
That’s what they named it.
I don’t know.
Because there is a lot your Mama doesn’t know.
Alder I just don’t.
We are driving along on the road.
“What are those people doing?”
They are fixing the electrical wire.
Because it’s too close to the cars.
Because they don’t want people to get hurt.
Because he promised to needle people.
Because they don’t feel well and Papa’s needles help them to feel better.
You have to ask your Papa that one.
(that one repeats itself about twenty times a day)
We have had our snack and are now sitting out on a deserted deck looking over the river. We have been watching the river, playing with Giraffe and Alder has been making giraffe and I meals. Each time the wind blows Alder jumps in my lap to warm up.
“Why is it cold?”
The wind is blowing and it’s still just Spring.
Because the days are still short and we are tilted away from the sun.
“Can we go in the water?”
Not now it’s still cold.
Because the water is just melted snow.
Because it has only melted in the last few weeks.
Because it has been warm.
-sigh- Because it is Spring, just not summer yet.
These are just a few of the endless stream of WHY that I hear every day. Alder has never been one to do anything halfway so I hear why 20,000 times a day and sometimes it makes me grit my teeth other times I have fun answering. I know intellectually he is just trying to make sense of the world that he inhabits, but when the day is stalled so many times by why that hours are missing it is hard to not feel as though he is trying to frustrate me.
I also know that when our days have engaging activities going on, playgrounds, errands, librarys, visiting friends, painting and such the whys become only an afterthought on his part. Being us is a constant balancing act of satisfying both of our emotional needs throughout the day. I could tell you that it has more to do with getting things done or amusing activities but really what we are doing constantly is trying to find those spots where both of us are engaged and not wishing we were somewhere else.